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Talk about a difficult lesson to learn.
Especially as a woman, wife, momma and/or leader. It is in our nature to feel as though we have to have control all the time.
In some social circles and families it is common that other people might make you feel as though you are failing, or not qualified if you do not have control all the time. Maybe, you have come to that conclusion on your own; I did. I had it in my head that if I didn't have control over every single thing I could, that I would look like a bad wife, a horrible mom, and unqualified business owner and employee.
I truly believe that I worked myself into that mindset through fear of failure and the fear of making a mistake, and honestly, I had every right to have worked myself up. I am far from perfect, and have made some tortious mistakes. These same mistakes could have easily turned my loved ones away from me, broken my marriage, and so on. (Vulnerable moment, here!)
Let Go Of Control
I need to preface this by saying, some control is okay. I am really speaking to the person who allows the needing to have control, and the lack of control work them up until their anxiety is ruling their life.
You know those memories that pop up on your Facebook profile? This message had already been placed on my heart, and a post from two years ago popped up in my "memories". And the message in that post was very similar to what I am sharing here, "I am reminded that our minds cause anxiety and worry, and that we should just lean on Him, because in the end- He is in control of everything."
Like I mentioned before, learning to be okay with not having control is a difficult lesson to learn, but... I can't even begin to explain how much peace letting it go, can bring to your mind, your heart and your spirit. It is truly the most unexplainable feeling.
It is truly soothing to know that God is in control, to know that I am giving Him control over every detail of my life.
Let's face it, even if I had complete control over every aspect of my life, my children's life... it doesn't compare to His control, His plan for us. Honestly, there is truly very little things that we can control anyways. Things like how I perform in my jobs (professional, business, being a mom, wife, etc.), making ends meet, making memories with my babies, teaching them right from wrong and teaching them how to be good people, and so on.
What is meant to be, will find it's way, and when it is a God thing, it's meant to be and there is nothing you can do to change or stop that!
It's cliché, I know; but, it truly is the truth.
It's a rewarding truth, too!
HOW Can I learn to be okay
A couple of years ago, I was in the roughest patch of life I have encountered thus far. My youngest child had almost died only a couple of days after she was born, our NICU experience was constant roller coaster of emotions, and that continued for the following 6 months of her life. I suffered miserably from undiagnosed postpartum depression and anxiety. (My at the time doctor's solutions were to change birth controls around, and brush it under the rug.)
So, how did I wiggle myself out of that? Well, I don't think this is something that goes a way completely, this is mental health, it is something you have to work at constantly.
Some verses to reference
Ecclesiastes 1:15 | Hebrews 10:23 | Philippians 3:13-14
Romans 6:13 | Psalm 61:2
Hey Ya'll! My name is Amy, I am a girl mom (times two), married to one of my favorite guys, a daughter, a Jesus follower and so much more. I love preworkout and a great sweat, I collect books like trophies, I love to cook but hate a dirty kitchen. I love grungy country music, bell bottom pants, turquoise (the mineral) and converses. Our house is full of love and laughter as we navigate this busy life together, focusing on keeping the important parts of life the biggest parts, and building a healthy and safe place in our family of four!